Kill the Thunder, See the Lightening

There he stands, dumbstruck, leaning on a dimming street light in his
bitter bubble of private time, with that fake smile on his face,
fading fast, desperately trying to look in the rippling water and see
his reflection in an optimistic light, where everyone sees his
pessimism ravaging his poorly lit heart; where from inside his
realistic ways are robbing him of his dreams, his heart, and
ultimately, his life. He doesn't know what he wants: a book of epics
handed down where his name be highlighted in, his greatness exhibited
universally, and he transpired to the world, where people would pay
him loving tribute? The legend he dreamed of with-holding: having a
holy legacy that would live beyond his existence? Or a place where his
soul would be unqualified, but would glow within, invisible to
mankind, but no longer seeking that legendary salvation, no longer
needing his last lifelines to sanity, heartfelt inner satisfaction
descending upon him. He needs to stop pretending everything is okay,
until its too late, until he sits back, paralyzed, watching his hopes,
his ambitions, and his dreams torn away from the firm grip of his arms
and slowly drift away, uncovering a veil of tears; tears not of
satisfaction or relief, but tears of despair and hopelessness. Does it
even matter what he wants anymore, when there's always a greater force
out there, the people he truly loves, but hates what they're doing to
his life, disabling him from the decision-making he longs to be
control of?

Another wasted night where he lays, meditating, torn, in a wounded
silence. Another exhausted breath, drawn from a flagged boy's lungs.
Another lost heart, feeling its way through the darkness. His heart
overflows with so many underground, disguised secrets; facts that are
slowly consuming his soul, hiding the glorious reality of this
glorious world from the eyes of his confused heart. Thoughts of
desperate hopelessness, like a rat, scurry through his mind, having
nothing to plan for, nothing to build his dreams on in this
effervescent convalescence to what may be the rest of his life. A long
journey of self-discovery awaits him as he must find what he really
cares for the most, and how much he cares; what he's willing to
sacrifice to keep what his heart leads him to. All he can do now is
let his mind and his heart struggle, as well as collaborate among
themselves, an odyssey that will teach him the outcome of what his
dreams have been built on, the journey that will show him that he
doesn't need people to put their ears on the wall of his abandoned
heart to hear what's inside and understand him, that life is better
than that, that there was nothing wrong with being lost, for it is
always the right step to being discovered.